*waves sheepishly in the general direction of my neglected readership*
So just about three months ago, I was writing regularly about exploring this brand new world of woo-woo and spiritual endeavors, and I was enjoying the hell out of it.
And it was good.
And then some things happened. And some more things. And a few more. And before I knew it, I was paying far less attention to the crystals in my bra and obsessing over my next steps in life.
By late January, I had been working – a little, anyway – from home for ten months. I had successfully regained the missing balance in our family life. I had reclaimed the intimacy in my marriage, was making better choices at the grocery store, cooking and cleaning muh DAMN self, and spending more time with the people in my home that a high-pressure corporate job had taken me away from for so long.
And it was good.
Until it wasn’t.
I started getting that itch to be back in the saddle. I wanted to be with people I wasn’t married to or had birthed again. I wanted to make inappropriate comments to people that weren’t just in my phone, and make spreadsheets, and have deadlines, and take phone calls, and train and grow and learn and just DO again.
But. Big BUT (and I cannot lie). I was going to do this the right way this time. I wasn’t going to just rush back into the workforce all willy-nilly and find myself spinning in that same old cycle yet again. This time I wanted to be a professional success AND find a successful balance that allowed me time with my family, and possibly even more importantly, time with myself.
If ten months of sequestering myself in my house taught me anything, it’s that I truly value quality Tracy time, and yet I rarely make it a priority.
I started thinking about places that brought me peace, types of businesses that provide a service that matters. I wanted to be a part of something that made the world a better place, and where my knowledge and experience – both professionally and a human with a lot of human experiences – could be of value.
I started working on affirmations and manifestation surrounding this compulsion. I yearned for clarity. I bought crystals. I studied my stars. I meditated on the life I wanted to lead, and the legacy I wanted to leave.
Around this same time, I started seeing more posts from the acupuncture clinic I used to visit back when I was going through infertility treatments. I have followed this badass, woman-owned and -run business for years, and have referred numerous patients their way for help with infertility. It wasn’t unusual to see their postings, but the articles and positive-vibe inspirational memes they were posting were speaking directly to my soul.
On a complete whim, I sent a very short Facebook messenger note to the owner of the clinic who I used to see for acupuncture and Chinese herbal medications for fertility. I didn’t expect to hear much back, but then… I did.
The clinic owner called me. She asked for my resume, and told me that it was so interesting that I’d reached out the day I had because she was just getting ready to start the search for a business manager for her growing clinic, but hadn’t posted anything about the job yet.
I, of course, sent my resume, and waited. She called the next day and asked if we could meet, and our meeting went so unbelievably well – it was like I was looking for in a job exactly what she was looking for in a human to perform said job.
I met with the interim business manager the following week, and he hugged me after we talked. I met the rest of the clinic staff and practitioners. I started feeling the belonging long before I got the call to offer me the job.
I started my Chinese new job on the Chinese New Year.
So that’s the long story of how I got distracted from writing by my exotic mistress, Chinese medicine. I’m now the business manager of a thriving clinic completely run and staffed by women, and I could not be happier with what I’m able to do every day.
I get to interact with coworkers who are of a like mind and energy, and who still like inappropriate comments from time to time. I get to learn about traditional Chinese medicine techniques, herbal medications, holistic and energetic healing methods, and we have weekly meetings where the entire staff participates in guided meditations together.
I also get to do something I’m truly passionate about – well, aside from spreadsheets, anyway. I get to meet and speak with infertility patients, talk to them about my experience as an infertility patient who saw success using Chinese medicine practices, and work with the clinic staff to create processes and procedures that will help our women’s health patients find support both within our clinic and outside of it. I get to promote the Resolve infertility support group I started back in 2014, and refer women to a group of the most supportive and informational ladies on the whole internet. I get to connect these despairing infertility patients with supportive fellow sufferers, but more than that, I get to connect them with their future best friends.
I get to use the shit I’ve been through in the past to bring hope to women in the thick of it right NOW, and that makes me more satisfied in this job than I’ve ever been in my whole life.
I might be a late bloomer, but maybe good things really do happen to those who dick around, don’t have a clue what they want to do with their lives, take soul-sucking jobs that pay the bills, get fed up, dye their hair purple, quit their jobs, turn into hermits for the better part of a year, and finally use woo-woo to find their way to a fulfilling professional life.
You know, that old saying.
I’m sorry it’s been so long – and that THIS is so long, honestly – and I hope to be spending some more time here now that life is settling down a little more.
Love and moonbeams n’ shit to all of you!